Student Essay

In both â€Å"Hard Choices† and â€Å"Initiation into Adulthood† we are giving a look at three different stories, everyone who is approach to adulthood is filled with growing pains, and stretching out of our comfort zones, and the decisions that make us who we are. Each of the Essays looks at them differently. What made one better than the other? We learn that getting and keeping the reader's attention Is very important. The author of â€Å"Hard Choices† let us know what we are going to be reading about fast. In the essay â€Å"Hard Choices† we are given a clear Introduction and thesis statement.Telling us that we are looking at an overview of different stories, not Just a story written about children's choices or their passage to adulthood can help us to understand what we are reading. By letting us know right away what the essay Is looking at makes It easier to read. Furthermore, â€Å"Hard Choices† did a good Job comparing the three stones. Not o nly holding our attention with clear overviews that were Interesting but also a paragraph at the end comparing them all. Then closing with a conclusion that was short and to the point will help with understanding.In tot essays we get a comparison of the 3 stories in the conclusion, there are still some points that left me looking for clarity, after reading â€Å"Initiation into Adulthood† In the â€Å"Hard Choices† They not only looked at each story it addresses a total comparison taking the comparison further. One weakness that I saw in the essay â€Å"Hard Choices was the way two of the paragraphs started, â€Å"Like† and â€Å"Likewise† are so similar that is almost repetitive. There are other words that could have replaced one of them. Starting each of the paragraphs differently would make for better reading.Although the word choice was great the start of each of the paragraphs was repetitive. On a whole the essay â€Å"Hard Choices was well written and superb at keeping our attention altering the way each paragraph was started would have made it more enjoyable. Looking at â€Å"Initiation into Adulthood† the start was misleading; don't wait till the thesis statement to let us know the essay is a comparison of stories. When first reading â€Å"Initiation into Adulthood† it appeared as though this paper would be talking about how we all become adults and grow to have our own say in the life e live.This can be miss-leading and loose some reader at that point. Also, being more concise and interesting in your disruptions of each story will help to keep each reader reading, looking for more. We were told what happened in the story but the reader's attention may or may not be held if they are not a little more Involved. â€Å"Initiation into Adulthood† was written using proper grammar and conveyed the correct Information. Summing it all up, Writing a paper comparing the works of others can be helpful and also hu rtful at the same time.The approach best taken loud be one that holds a reader's attention telling us as we go the highlights and comparisons, Including the good and bad. But then at the end answers any questions that might be out there unanswered and still needing more Information Student Essay By Tweets We learn that getting and keeping the reader's attention is very important. The the essay â€Å"Hard Choices† we are given a clear introduction and thesis statement. Understand what we are reading. By letting us know right away what the essay is looking at makes it easier to read.Furthermore, â€Å"Hard Choices† did a good Job impairing the three stories. Not only holding our attention with clear overviews that were interesting but also a paragraph at the end comparing them all. Then closing some points that left me looking for clarity, after reading â€Å"Initiation into Adulthood†. Reader's attention may or may not be held if they are not a little more involv ed. Correct information. Summing it all up, Writing a paper comparing the works of comparisons, including the good and bad. But then at the end answers any questions that might be out there unanswered and still needing more information